Do bee just wanted to do the right thing...and wanted to know, how would I know? Who would tell me the answers to all my little questions much less the bigger ones? They started teasing little do bee da. "I am not do bee da! I am a good do bee!!"
I am not a don't bee *pout* I am a sensitive little swc do bee!
"Never injure a child even in jest."
I had what everyone thought was an allergy to fish and broke out with hives and itchy eyes and painful blisters at the least opportune times. And not on my forearm or behind a knee. My childish mind would retreat inside and ask "Why God, why me? Why my face?" Now there was an even more provoking name to call do bee. Charlie wanna minnow? I got really mad. And ugly. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. But why me? When I was a child I thought like a child and reasoned like a child but now I know...Thanks Charlie for protecting our feelings; now the H can go and Carlie can stay!!
By the time Jr. High rolled around, my tender adolescent soul hardened like a coat of Sally Hansen's finest on brittle nails. Enter rebel pot smoking partying mixed with sports, good grades and cheerleading. Ms. K poked me with a not so subtle jab and wrote in my 7th grade yearbook "you are a study in contradictions." Terri tells me now that teacher is not who I thought she was. Thirty years and an ex-husband and lover later, I learned "the truth hurts but not as much as the eventual anguish the soul feels when deception is revealed. The desperate attempts to piece together, the disorientation of figuring out what is really real magnified by the inability to grasp another's intentionality to shroud. Tell me the truth so that I can exist and act upon what I know versus what has been hidden." I am never afraid of what I know. Anna Sewell
amazing love how can it be
then one glorious winter morning...the same sun that melts wax hardens clay. Are not all angels ministering spirits sent to serve those who will inherit salvation? And there is rejoicing in heaven when once lost is found once blind now sees. I found it! He found me.
A buried desire~another chance. Month after month hope after hope~dashed. Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. Enter trusting Him no matter what.
escaping the matrix
tnt renovation time!
tearing down~building up~living abundantly in love!
first...unlearn "doing numb" then rethink-refeel-redo everything.
I am still learning to be.
"I'm not kinesthetic!"
And then I woke up.
I'm sensitive and I'd like to stay that way.
it is written in the sand...
"And I will give to each one a white stone, and on the stone will be engraved a new name that no one understands except the one who receives it." Rev. 2:17
testing the water
Let me be a shining light for you
~Let me be a joy to you always~
...for it is the wellspring of life!